WHAT WE TELL OUR selves is a statistic that I believe is more important than what we say to others. It might be easier for you to read about something that you tell yourself than to hear others say it to you. If someone else tells you something that you want to hear, but you don’t like much of what they say, speaking it out loud or thinking it through is where you can go to cleanse your soul and heart.
Tell yourself how you want to be with yourself and your life and stop judging yourself through the eyes of others (and processing their “feelings”; our emotions; though, you know, once you clean your own feelings and process them they rarely go away on their own.) What we need and sometimes tell ourselves is those things that supporters, colleagues, friends, spouses, mentors, families, and yes, even bosses sometimes tell us to stop doing or stop saying.
Those things we tell ourselves that are more valuable to our soul; our trust, our lives, and our day-to-day activities, are unique to each one of us and remain apart of our heart and soul as we have grown and continue to grow in our evolution. So, if one particular thing from someone that you disagree with reoccurs time and again, instead of judging yourself and feeling defeated because you think you need to fix it, challenge it to see the greater opportunity that your soul already sees! It is likely that the mindset of the ” ascetic” is the reason you and it will both serve you much more your whole life to move beyond and resolve it. The question “how do I do this?” now becomes “what will happen if I don’t?”
Understanding that “how do I do that?” is not a mind-frame anymore and that life’s “how-to” are, you see, not many. So, trust and co-create what you want! Look at what life presents and make a foundational agreement with yourself that “I am doing this now!” Change is often the hard work. But in order to bask in happiness, joy, and creativity we have to see the opportunity and then allow what we see to move us forward and create new feelings and enabling thoughts. Our “how-to” is practice, practice, practice.
CLEAN OUT your history. Recognize places where you were hurt. We are all wounded from some place. Find your memories and heal them without being logical about it and without applying a stop- consultancy approach. Take the best, and leave the rest.
Forgive, move on, ask for forgiveness, and then move on; forgiving others is not a big blue pill to swallow. If you hang around with a company that just spits out the same negativity over and over again, you are probably part of that cycle.
Stop. Listen to the thoughts that come to you. What thoughts are connected to fear, anger, guilt, and blame? The more you listen to them the more you begin to trust the negative ones; and, the more they come to define who you are. They are doing nothing but reflecting what is not real for you right now without challenging your mastery of that or stepping out of that untested paradigm. Ban them! Witness no more to their messages.
Re-focus on who you are NOW, not in the past. You are more now than you were yesterday. Yesterday is dead, it was done and gone. Yet, waiting outside for your energy, your happiness, to come back to you is a sure sign that you have not laughed where you are. Of course, you will feel better when you laugh, but the act of going for your happiness says to your subconscious and your heart that all is possible, that even today you can have happiness as you ever dreamed yours to be.
The release of non-supportive thoughts, memories, emotions are the key to your self-love. It is the key to your mastery over your own self-talk and your vision of the future.